Just Effing Entertain Me

James Wolcott on Indie Films – Ouch!

I have a love/hate relationship with Vanity Fair, the iconic cultural-society-literary-celebrity publication now in its famed second incarnation, having been revived 25 years ago and helmed by some guy then Tina Brown and now Graydon Carter (my two cents: don’t change the hair).

I have been a subscriber for lo these 25 years. Love it because receiving my Vanity Fair each month is a happy-mail-box ritual and I love, in this order, the Proust Questionnaire, the letters to the editor (in which I was once anonymously soft quoted as complaining about the number of ads that appear before the table of contents unless some other chick said the same thing in the same way which is possible but let me dream) Dominic Dunne, Christopher Hitchens and James Wolcott. Hate because the copious, upscale ad content clashes mightily with my values and makes it A NIGHTMARE to find the table of freaking contents.

But yes, I do like reading about the lives of various Princess Von Furstenburg-Hapsburg-McFabulous’s because it’s a guilty pleasure of mine even though at the end of aforementioned guilty-pleasure bio-article, I am usually in touch with my inner angry Communist self. These people are so vain and so shallow! And so rich! LOOK at that spread of their palace-compound-castle! But ohhhhh to have a peek into such a rarefied world…

In the latest issue, the one with Marilyn Monroe on the cover, James Wolcott, erudite cultural critic, tells us of his new discovery – television. It’s a really great article, actually – slightly behind the curve for Wolcott, says I – but well worth a read.

But tucked into the middle of this great article, Wolcott gets ensnared in two things: generalized, “the good old days” snobbery when it comes to indie films and witty, elliptical turns of phrase that make grasping his point an annoying exercise in parsing, well – witty, elliptical turns of phrase. To wit:

Most of these loosely-hung-together slow-metabolism vignettes remain nestled on the naturalistic surface, with mumblecore films caterpillaring into unmade beds.

Despite their supposed deviance from Hollywood formula, indie films are sometimes no better and often worse in their time-released didacticism and midafternoon droop, the characters so depleted by anomie, shrunken-head defeatism, dead-end prospects, deadbeat friends, bed-head hair, and a wardrobe of carefully selected from the dirty-clothes hamper that they can barely drag themselves to the diner to watch the new waitress tie her apron.

and

There’s an overdetermined depressiveness to so many indies – noble in intent, conscientious in execution, they tell you tonally from the opening shot or the first scratchy musical note that there’ll be no Shawshank Redemption at the end of this bus ride….[whereas] Television spares us the faint twitchings of twig life.

Now mind you: I have seen indie films that Wolcott is describing here, I really have. But Wolcott seems to (and it’s hard to say since his writing here is quite definitely a mumblecore article caterpillaring into an unmade bed) be indicting all indie film except those of Paul Mazursky. To which I say – dude? Jim? You’re making yourself sound really, really old here. There have been indie films caterpillaring into all sorts of disheveled messes as long as there have been indie films. Wake up and smell the JUNO.

We all know the power of words to persuade, romance, inflame and provoke. Anonymous internet jackasses know it (albeit unwittingly), screenwriters know it, novelists and journalists know it. And certainly Wolcott, a writer I greatly admire precisely for his rich, rambling, old-school voice knows it.

But in this article, Wolcott, like Ziggy Stardust, got sucked up into his own mind and the result is a mildly entertaining, thoroughly prejudiced, somewhat inaccurate musing on indie film. The main gist of the article is the delivery, speed and ascendance of good television, which in my view is inarguable. But -

…[whereas in indie film] there’s a slumpy sameness to the dialogue delivery and body language, as if everyone were making withdrawals from the the same tired bloodbank.

Really, Jim? The majority of the time? Of course, the more movies you see, the more clear it becomes that just because a film has “indie” or “foreign” in front of it, does not automatically mean that greatness or intellectual, hipster or existential heights have been reached. But I do think Wolcott is rather letting his age show and is overlooking some of the best movies ever put to celluloid – or digital video, as it were, and as a lover of such, I take offense at the lumping together of all indie films as pretentious exercises in nothingness. Yes, yes, we all know that “indie” films aren’t generally as “indie” as they used to be. But on the whole, they are one of the few outlets for filmmakers to unleash characters and dialogue that are anything but anemic blood bank withdrawals suffering from slumpy sameness and navel-gazing.

And while the ascendance of great television is inarguably a threat to the box office, great television is hardly new – there’s just more of it now.

In my view, television still offers, on the whole, a vast acreage of vapid nothingness compared to indie film. Reality programs, teeny bopper musings on Vanity Fair inspired rich-life pipe dreams (a guilty pleasure but not mine) and stultifyngly dull, outdated sitcoms the success of which mystify me. Everybody Loves Raymond. Really? Did they?

For every great television show there are 10 awful shows. So let’s keep our wits about us here. Wolcott’s rather sweeping take on indie film as a head-up-its-own-arse exercise in nothing-muchness is too sweeping for this girl’s taste.

Despite having taken exception to the midsection of this particular Wolcott piece – I recommend reading it. Because I may be complaining here, but damn I love a good writer, even if Wolcott writes the equivalent of indie-mumblecore-caterpillar-slouching-into-intellectual pretension while protesting it at the same time. Love ya, mean it Jim. Have your people call my people.

To read James Wolcott’s blog, click HERE.

Emmy Recap

I don’t usually watch the Emmys. I know – shame on me. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a Luddite, I watch some tv; probably more in the past couple of years than in earlier times in my life. But I watched this particular Emmys initially because my best friend works on Grey’s Anatomy and had a little something to do with the Michael Phelps bit that Jimmy Kimmel did. Which I though was HILARIOUS. So I tuned in for that only to get sucked into the show afterward. Here are my observations:

Not nice things I thought and felt bad about and yet….
Wow Oprah has (re)gained a lot of weight!
Candace Bergen – she’s aged well but that blouse – ew!
Mary Tyler Moore – one of my idols but BLEEP! The plastic surgery overkill is disturbing and disappointing. Especially side by side with Betty White who has not gone down that road.

Awards that made me really happy:
Alec Baldwin
Betty White
Tina Fey

Best moments:
Jimmy Kimmel’s lead in show
Tommy Smothers speech
Glen Close’s speech: …we’re proving that complicated, powerful, mature women are sexy and…can carry a show.
Josh Groban’s medley of television theme songs
When Kathy Griffin commanded the audience to Get. Uuuup for Don Rickles.

Most cringe-worthy moments:
The lame Heidi Klum joke about ripping off her tuxedo; that landed with a horrible thud.
The lame reality host time killer at the top of the show
Howie Mandel. Every time.
The Laugh-in presentation

Best sly jibe at a dumb move:
Conan O’Brien’s reference to Katherine Heigl’s assertion that the material given her character in the last season of Grey’s was not worthy of an Emmy nomination.

Most telling quote:
Barry Sonnenfeld, Director, Pushing Daisies: Love TV and fear the internet.

Funniest quote, attributed to Lorne Michaels by Tina Fey:
Don’t ever follow a hippy to a second location.

Most disturbing and annoying commercial slogan:
ABC’s National Stay at Home Week

Most egregious music-off:
Kirk Ellis, writer, John Adams:
…a period when articulate men articulated complex thoughts in complete sentences. They used words….music. ARGHGH!

Most boring sweep:
John Adams. Full disclosure: I haven’t seen it. And I’m a history buff.

Most egregious waste of a comedy actress who should be more famous:
Sarah Chalke shilling underpants with the slogan: Be wedgie free!
Close runner up: Jamie Lee Curtis and that yogurt that makes you more regular ad.

In Memoriam’s that made me really feel sad:
George Carlin
Suzanne Pleshette
Sydney Pollack
Dick Martin
Bernie Mac
Deborah Kerr
Harvey Korman
Jim McKay

And – Bozo the Clown died?

Random thoughts:
Until CSI I had never heard of William Peterson. I mean, he’s good but I have literally never noticed him in anything before. So. You know. I guess I’m a dope.

Laurence Fishburn’s red jacket: not so much.

Was Craig Ferguson drunk?

Why does Brooke Shields increasing look like a man?

Sally Field still sounds like Gidget and it is vaguely discomfiting.

Is Entourage a comedy? Why was it in that category?

Tom Selleck – holy BLEEP is he still handsome. Man.

Tina Fey’s multiple wins made me really happy – really happy – but she didn’t need to shill her show when she won the best comedy award. Don’t worry, Tina, we’re watching your show. And we know where to find it, thanks.

Complete list of winners.

Got a Great TV Pilot?

Hello, Wavers – this just in:

Dear Writers, Actors and Filmmakers:

FX is looking for their next big COMEDY pilot TV show – similar to It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia. If you have an over-the-top comedy Pilot TV show, here’s the LINK

If you have one, or know someone who might be interested, pass it on!

But, Do I Really Need an Agent?

by Margaux Froley Outhred

TV writing is a job where writers often have to work their way up the ladder. More so than in features, where, if you are lucky enough to write a million dollar spec idea, you are thrown into the feature pool. In TV there are a lot of annoying double standards. To get staffed on a TV show, the writer must show the showrunner writing samples which should be at least one spec of an existing show and also something, like a pilot, that shows their original voice. To be staffed on a show, the writer must prove that they can mimic someone else’s voice (the showrunner’s), and still bring something new to the table. (It’s really about walking a fine line here.)

Now, how much do you know about showrunners? The quick answer is that showrunners are the people who create a show and then often will be the ones who run the writer’s room, along with making the majority of decisions on the production of that show, from casting to costumes….the showrunner really does prove that TV is a writers medium. However, no network is just going to let anyone be a showrunner. (Most pilots don’t get made for less than $1 million..so, you have to have a track record for them to put $1m in your hands.) In your case, you would have to have been working in TV for awhile to be considered as a showrunner.

There are cases, however, of less experienced writers getting paired up with existing, larger showrunners. However, those people often get pushed to the side…those larger showrunners, the majority of the time will pay you for your idea and basically get you to go away. If you are lucky, and have the track record behind you…you would get hired to be a higher level writer on the series.

Agents really are the name of the game in TV because they are good at getting people into those staff positions so they can work their way up to being showrunners one day. Again, the annoying double-edge sword rule is that you have to have good original material to land the agent in the first place. In TV, lots of the writing you do is what gets you hired to do more writing, as opposed to that writing really being a viable project to sell…at least to start off.

If you have written a sitcom that is GREAT, pair that with a solid and current spec or two, and you would be ready to shop to agents. If you land at a big enough agency, they MIGHT be able to pair you with a showrunner to push your pilot further, but the pilot would have to be spectacular (most showrunners prefer to create their own shows than hear others)..and the agency would probably want you to prove yourself as a working writer first. Getting you the experience it takes to be a good showrunner is key…because sometimes a showrunner can start off big, but lack the experience and know-how to keep a show going and how to run a staff. (which ends up being career suicide as opposed to a slower but safer rise to the top.)

Most studios and networks couldn’t even read your pilot for pure legal reasons, so yes, you would need an agent, or a pretty well-known lawyer, to get your pilot in the door. But again, it wouldn’t quite be worth it unless you have the chops to be a showrunner now. A pilot might serve you very well for staffing season, but again, should be paired with a current TV spec also.

This is a tight year for many TV shows and agencies also, keep in mind, (because of the strike), so, this could be a great year to use the strength of that pilot to enter into some of the Fellowship programs in town. I think both Disney/ABC and Warner Bros. want original material for their submissions. Having the pedigree of one of those programs really helps give you an upper hand among the competition.

-and Margaux should know. A recipient of the Warner Brother’s Television Fellowship in 2007, she is busily working on a pilot and a one-act play. Her services are available through the Script Department. And to all the boys who continually tell me they have a crush on Margaux – yeah, you would. Too bad she’s happily married to a handsome poker afficionado.

Matt Nix Exclusive!

The Rouge Wave and The Script Department’s Dave Sparling recently had the chance to catch up with Matt Nix, creator and Executive Producer of USA Network’s hit show “Burn Notice,” which will go into production on Season 2 when the WGA strike is settled. Anyone with any interest in developing a TV series should be inspired by Matt’s successful freshman effort in the medium.

DS/RW: “Burn Notice” is your first foray into television, quickly becoming a hit for USA while earning praise from critics. Can you talk a bit about the factors that led you, a longtime feature-centric writer with roots in the indie side of the spectrum, to the so-called “small screen?”

DS/RW: The WGA strike notwithstanding, has the success of the show stoked demand for you as a feature writer? Anything in the feature pipeline you’d like to tell us about?

MN: There’s not a lot of crossover between TV and features. I wouldn’t say the show has stoked demand, exactly. Perhaps there’s a comfort factor, in that there’s something I’ve done that has been reasonably successful. It’s good to be able to prove to people that your words can be used to expose film, and that the results are considered entertaining by some subset of the population. But the worlds are pretty separate.

I’m writing a few things. I had a comedy in development at Warner Brothers, and I’m doing another draft of that, for producers Jon Shestack (AIR FORCE ONE) and David Dobkin (director of THE WEDDING CRASHERS). I’m writing a kids film for Nickelodeon, sort of a paranoid thriller for children. And I’m writing the HOT WHEELS movie for Warner Brothers and producer Joel Silver, which is a big action movie. I’m pretty excited about all of them.
DS/RW: Any plans to direct an episode of the show? If so, do you think it’d be an episode you wrote?

MN: Yes, I’m planning on directing an episode this season. It will almost certainly be my own episode… it’s just a matter of making sure the show is running smoothly enough that I can take that time to devote to directing.

DS/RW: As Executive Producer/showrunner, have you found yourself in the tenuous position of being expected to continue the non-writing aspects of the show while you’re on strike as a writer? (If so) how has that worked out in practice?

MN: Actually, I’ve been fortunate in that we were in writer prep for the show when the strike hit. There wasn’t really much producing to do. For this strike, the producers are really trying to hold the line and not produce OR write, and I’m standing with them on that. So I can’t really be involved with the DVD, which sucks, but other than that, there wasn’t anything to do except write.

DS/RW: Have the logistics of running the show made it impossible or difficult for you to keep current with feature releases and/or any favorite TV series of yours? If not, what’s blown you away lately and why have you found it so compelling?

MN: I’ve watched some stuff. It’s more having three little kids at home that gets in the way of my movie viewing, but I haven’t gotten out much. I watch “Dexter,” which is probably my favorite show. It’s intelligent but never pretentious, and it’s a great mix of character and plot. Plus, it’s another show with voice-over set in Miami, so it has that going for it. My favorite movie recently was SUPERBAD which I thought was fantastic.

DS/RW: You set up “Burn Notice” with no significant experience under your belt on the TV side of the industry. Any suggestions for writers looking to follow in your footsteps?

MN: I think the thing that served me best was keeping one eye on writing something that I cared about and another eye on the realities of what worked for the network, the studio, and the executives involved. It was less a matter of balancing the two than it was a matter of finding a way to do both at the same time – I worked really hard to make sure that I was always doing work I was proud of, while at the same time being really conscious of the fact that I was working in a specific context. There can be a temptation to regard the studio and the network as meddlers getting in the way of your vision. I think that’s counterproductive. They’re setting the parameters, and then it’s your job to succeed within those parameters. Sometimes that’s impossible, but more often than not you can find something that works for everyone. You have to fight the battles that matter, but you also have to make sure everyone’s always on the same team, moving forward toward the goal.

You have to listen to everyone. The minute you think you’ve got all the answers, you’re dead. I learned from everyone. I took notes from everyone – from the network, the studio, the writers, the actors, my assistant, my mom. I sought out criticism, and when something wasn’t working, I killed it, no matter how long I spent working on it. I was shameless about calling people and asking “how do you do this?” And when you come to people with that attitude, you’d be surprised how willing they are to help.

Matt Nix serves as executive producer, writer and creator of the new USA Network original series BURN NOTICE, which premieres Thursday, June 28 at 10pm/9c.
Nix has worked as a feature writer since 1997. He has written scripts for Warner Brothers, Columbia, Paramount, Universal, and New Line, as well as several independent companies. He has had the opportunity to write in a range of genres, including dramas, thrillers, light comedies, dark comedies and children’s films.

Nix currently has several feature projects in active development – an adaptation of the bestselling young adult novel “Chasing Vermeer” with Warner Brothers, a workplace comedy for Warner Brothers, and a “paranoid thriller for children” for Paramount/ Nickelodeon Films. He is also an acclaimed director of several short films. His work has been featured on the SCI FI Channel, FX Movies Channel, PBS and in numerous film festivals around the world. He lives in Pasadena with his wife and three children.

ShowHype: hype it up!

TV Premiere Week

The Script Whisperer’s resident television expert, Margaux Froley Outhred has got some choice thoughts about premiere week and what we can expect:

The new Fall television schedule is officially upon us. Each network is pandering to our desires, trying to stand out from the rest, desperate to guarantee that we set our Tivos to THEIR new shows (not their competitors). And hopefully, if they’ve done their job right, we’ll tune back into our old favorite shows returning for another season.

So, the big question is, are you taking the bait? The networks have updated their websites, imbedded ads into popular blogs (anyone think those ABC DIRTY SEXY MONEY ads on Perez Hilton are odd?), and are even advertising their new shows during theatrical film trailers. It’s early in the week, but I’m going to go out on a limb and say, I’m not impressed thus far.

NBC seems to have gotten rid of that weird screen-saver interface and voice between their shows (remember that last season?). But, the HEROES season premier felt lackluster to me. Couldn’t they do a full episode without it having “TO BE CONTINUED”? I know it will be continued, you have a full season order, just give me one complete hour-long episode. CHUCK was interesting, but I’m not sure I want to devote an hour of my life to that this season each week. Same with JOURNEYMAN. A descent show, but it felt like QUANTUM LEAP without the charm. BIONIC WOMAN has some terrible moments in the script, but also some interesting fight sequences. The lazy factor of Wednesday night viewing might keep me in my chair for that one. And, even though I’ve heard some negative buzz, I truly enjoyed DIRTY SEXY MONEY, and might even secretly love the soapy-ness of GOSSIP GIRL. Tonight is a big debut night with GREY’S ANATOMY, BIG SHOTS, (I’m only tuning in for the hot guy factor) and NBC’s comedy line-up, desperate to keep you intrigued with Jim and Pam, Earl and….Earl. 30 ROCK is fresh off its Emmy win, hopefully audiences will finally show up in the numbers they deserve.

The next few weeks are interesting for us writers (television and feature) because this is where the shows will find their voices. Already in the preview for next week of JOURNEYMAN, it looks like they are trying to add a snappy one-liner here and there, (“Don’t worry, honey, I’ll be home for dinner”), something that was sorely missed in the premier. These shows have been shooting since June and/or July. Often these premier episodes were written by a singular writer/showrunner. Now, as the rest of these episodes begin to air, you’ll see how a team of writers can shape a show, give it more personality, or in some cases, potentially bring too many cooks into the kitchen. BIONIC WOMAN shut down production at the 5th episode to replace the showrunner and give the show a different direction. How will that come across in the episodes airing in mid-November or later? Are shows with lackluster reviews going to get thrown into the Friday night deadlands? Did you know that only one in three of these new shows will even be around next fall?

If any of you are writing television specs, or pilots, these are the interesting weeks. How does the schedule change to accommodate for flops or hits? Which shows will push the envelope and snare a new audience? Do people really buy that the teens in GOSSIP GIRL, drinking martinis, are really 15? How would you adjust or edit any of these shows? Did the returning hits raise the bar enough? What will be pulled first? And, can you tell yet which shows will be the hot specs to be writing this coming staffing season? My money is on GOSSIP GIRL and DIRTY SEXY MONEY hooking a scandal-loving audience. Character pieces like LIFE, and JOURNEYMAN might fight it out, but my guess is, given the popularity of the quirky drama HOUSE, LIFE will find an audience and beat out JOURNEYMAN. Comedy writers can look forward to another bleak year, but these character dramas seem to be where the action is at. At least in terms of writers having the opportunity for more work.

The race is on folks, may the best horse win. Or, in my case, just stay tuned for FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHTS and DEXTER, the only ones worth watching. Let’s hope they don’t prove me wrong!

Great Blog Resource for TV Writers

…So every once in awhile I check my site meter just to make sure my mom isn’t the only Rouge Waver reader (hi mom!) and also look to see where Rouge Wave visitors are coming from. And today I noticed a reader who clicked over from a blog I was unfamiliar with. A short visit later, I was really impressed by this blog and wanted to share it with Rouge Waver readers, front and center. It’s Running With My Eyes Closed and it is, as my good buddy Manolo the Shoeblogger would say, super fantastic! So add this gem to your daily reads you aspiring television writers!